Not even a TEENAGER yet!

Posted on Facebook on Monday, July 25, 2011 at 4:50pm
Actual conversation with my oldest this morning:
Me: Honey, go put on your shoes.
C: Mommy, the babies can't put on their shoes by themselves!
Me: Honey, I'm talking to you.
C: Oh!  What did you want me to do?
Me: Go put on your shoes.
C: OK!  (Runs off down the hall, rummaging in room, returns a moment later) Mommy, I can't find the babies' shoes.
Me (Getting annoyed): No, honey, go put on YOUR shoes!!!
C:  Oh!  Where are they?
Me:  How would I KNOW?!?  Check your room!
C:  Ok!
I'm busy getting the babies' shoes, my shoes, my purse, etc.  C comes back nearly five minutes later
C: Can I put on my shoes now, or should I wait?
ME:  !?!?!?!?!?!?!?  PUT THEM ON!!!!!!
C:  Why do you always have to yell?  Could you try not yelling for one day?
Me:  Sure honey.  Could you try listening one day?  Are your shoes on?
C:  Well I can't go get them if we're gonna stand here discussing it!
(C flounces off to her room, stage right.  Mommy stands there, infuriated, trying to remember to breath.  Twins continue trying to destroy living room...)